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Contributions

Three issues this season... that's pretty poor even by our standards, but still one more than the Highbury High!

However, we're not averse to a bit of new blood, so if you think you can do better, why not send us your contributions.

Don't bother sending us funny football emails that turn up in your inbox, everyone's seen them and we're only interested in original material Sent them to The Gooner instead

Remember Up The Arse! is a satirical magazine, so:

• If you want an ego trip, try sending your stuff to the Highbury High. 
• If you think you can pick a better team than Wenger, try emailing The Gooner
• If you know exactly why Spurs had the shits, get writing!

However, we do have a few rules:

• No use of the "Y" word - we will remove it. Yeah, we know $pur$ fans call themselves that, but leave it out. We have more Jewish fans than they have, so don't be a complete scumbag.
• No excessively abusive filth. We're not averse to a bit of industrial language, but there's more than enough steaming piles of T*ttenh@m in the world and our mums and sisters read this you know. We try to keep content at roughly the 15 certificate level.
• No racist garbage - don't be a complete Lee Bowyer.